John Oliver Calls Upon Kenny G to Smooth Over China-US Relations
Satirical news anchor John Oliver of Last Week Tonight has enlisted the smoothest of all woodwind blowhards, Kenny G, to mitigate the current crisis happening in the South China Sea.
It is well documented that Kenny G’s 1989 instrumental hit “Going Home” can be found at public places all over China, signaling that your presence is no longer wanted and that it’s time for you to go the f*#k home.
He prefaced the segment by explaining the current situation, which sees escalating tension between America and China after a US guided-missile destroyer passed within 15km off the coast of Subi Reef, one of seven artificial islands built up by China in the past year. This provocation from the US agitated the Chinese military to the point that they stated future prodding in the region could cause a retaliation that will likely lead to an all out war. John’s conclusion was that Kenny G is our only hope and the billowy smoothness of his song “Going Home” will calm down everyone down and have a think before any warships are gutted by a torpedo.
