BJ Pizza Wars IX: Kro's Nest v Tube Station Pizza

In 2010, Beijing saw a food feud messier than scraping a salami special off a sheepskin carpet. Olaf Kristoffer "The Kro" Bauer and local Chinese partner Yuan Jie, both of Kro’s Nest, had somewhat of a falling out. Since billed as a cautionary case study of foreigners doing business in China, whatever the details, the result meant that Kristoffer walked. Kro’s Nest morphed into Tube Station, and since then, as we all know, a new Kro’s has arisen from the ashes. For months it was the talk of a town that takes these things a bit too seriously (we hold our hands up), but now the time for talking is over. It’s all about the eating. Let’s settle this.

In the red corner: Kro’s Special, RMB 174 (large)

Style Let’s call this one Brobdingnag-ian (geddit, lit fans?) It’s all about size and spectacle, in the great American tradition.

Crust When a pizza is this big, it needs sufficient bready heft not to collapse under its sea of toppings. Our table was divided. Some heralded the balanced savory flavor; others thought it too stodgy. Needless to say, we didn’t leave much.

Cheese 'n sauce Enough coagulated milk protein to kill a family of lactose intolerant diplodocus. It’s cheesy. Sauce a little bit sweet and processed.

Toppings Gosh. Pepperoni, ham, black olives, canned artichokes, green pepper, onions, mushrooms, mozzarella, tomato. Showed evidence of pre-cooking – important on a pie of this magnitude. Quantity over quality, but not by much.

Satisfaction? You’ll need a few (tipsy) friends to enjoy even a medium one of these. The pizza itself is good but not world-beating; what is great (and unique for Beijing) is the sheer size and ‘merican fun of the whole experience, underpinned by professionalism and a menu that is approaching a work of art.

Morning after One of the best next day pies so far.

Next up…

In the blue corner: Tube Station Special, Tube Station, RMB 38 (small)

Style I couldn’t muster the same crowd that got through three large Kro’s pizzas and half of Beijing’s reserves of Hoegaarden … So it’s just me, myself and one of Tube Station’s handy 10 inch single serving pies (they have humongous ones too). Let's call this one ABC. (American but Chinese).

Crust I like this crust. It’s chewy and crunchy in the right places, pleasantly salty and just thick enough. A good effort.

Cheese n sauce Loads of cheese, and boy is it stringy. Unfortunately it’s lathered over half the toppings, which means it all pulls away in one yellow heap. The sauce is less fun – a dried-herbs, out-of-the-jar taste.

Toppings Generous but chaotic. Too many sliced olives. Big pieces of uncooked mushroom. And the worst bit - some really revolting processed ham lurking in wait. This is where this pizza really falls down.

Satisfaction? Guiltily fills a hole but you might feel a bit grubby afterwards, mostly due to some of the questionable toppings and that sauce. Probably best eaten drunk. Crust is good though.

Morning after No thanks – this risk of encountering that meat is too great.

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While it would be wrong to infer that Tube Station has seriously slipped up since the split, it has at the very least stood still, perhaps going a bit more Chinese (when it comes to pizza, this isn’t a compliment). Kro’s Nest on the other hand has pulled off an ‘Obi Wan Kenobi’, getting struck down then becoming more powerful than we could possible imagine. That’s not to paint this in any way a tale of good versus evil. But that Tube Station ham is pure 'dark side'.

Verdict? Kro's Nest rules the galaxy.

Not full yet? Stay tuned to thebeijinger blog Mondays and Thursdays through the end of October for more Pizza Wars. In the mean time, revisit our previous head-to-head battles here:

Episode X: La Pizza v The Tree
Episode IX: Kro's Nest v Tube Station Pizza
Episode VIII: Alio Olio v Annie's
Episode VII: Alla Osteria v Cornerstone
Episode VI: Scott's Family Restaurant v Nasca
Episode V: Vineyard Cafe v Alba
Episode IV: Tavola v Pizza by LMPlus
Episode III: The Den v Pizza Buona
Episode II: Eatalia v Pyro Pizza
Episode I: Hutong Pizza v Pass-by Bar

For a full list of matchups, head here: http://www.thebeijinger.com/blog/BJ-Pizza-Wars