Fast Food Watch: KFC China Throws Caution to the Wind and Invents the Chicken Taco

Tom Arnstein | Aug 2, 2018 2:30 pm | Add a comment | 5164 reads

We live in exciting times, my friends. Only months ago we existed in a world where truth won over lies, Google stood as an ethically-minded corporate middle finger to China’s censorship, and tacos were constructed from the rustic combination of corn flour and water. KFC, following the undoubted monumental success of last June's chicken-based pizza (who could forget the Chizza), have set their sights on demolishing another universally cherished foodstuff – the taco (RMB 22, RMB 37 for a meal) – by what amounts to fisting a piece of chicken into a beloved recipe, throwing a proverbial slab of breaded cock into the works, if you will.

KFC’s entry into the world of Mexican food is notable for a number of reasons but we’ll start by asking the easy questions: which circular and flat part of the chicken is this? How does Da Vinci’s Vitruvian Man fit into the world of battery farming and the filling of deeply-entrenched emotional voids that only fast food can? And most importantly, why is there an entire piece of hot, limp lettuce taking up valuable real estate in here?

We asked but having eaten this baby Shamu-tongue’s-shaped portion of fried chicken, we can’t admit to having the wherewithal to answer any of them. As for tasting notes, there’s hot lettuce, a decidedly zingy Sichuan pepper-tinged sauce, at least 14 pieces of corn, and an admittedly fresh dose of tomato. It’s a medley of finely chopped and small components that guarantees half will fall onto your pants (ensconcing at least one step of the legit taco eating experience).

Most special perhaps is that each taco comes with a sneeze's-worth of blended avocado to garnish at least one bite of your Chexican delight. Given the relative scarcity of our favorite green fruit in China, we can only commend KFC for its addition, and in doing so marking another groundbreaking moment for the country's oldest Western fast food outlet.

In conclusion, the Chicken Taco is representative of the tumultuous epoch we find ourselves reluctantly floating through, and the emotions that arose upon its consumption acted as a suitable mirror for such. An uneasy feeling in the gut gave way to remembrance of the greasy blotch on my crotch, which in turn ignited the undeniable urge to put myself through it all again, just to feel. It’s with this sentiment that China can proudly add the Chicken Taco to its list of invented foods and continue its slow but sure chipping away at everything we thought we knew via the medium of fried chicken.