BJ Pizza Wars XII: Gung Ho! v Mao Mao Chong

Twenty-four pizza joints, twelve battles and a couple grand RMB later, we're finally here. Through pies glorious and terrible (or terribly glorious), we've soldiered on to this last battle. And honestly, yeah, I would probably go for a cheeseburger about now. For the final challenge, we went a little freestyle: we picked a random pizza off the menu. Sure, it's not quite the same stringent flavor-on-flavor we've been doing, but I believe these two creative contenders are strong enough to duke it out based on satisfaction alone.

On one bank, we've got Gung Ho!, slick-chic delivery whizzes that made exclamation marks briefly fashionable (irony mark next, guys?). On the other, hutong-hipster favorite Mao Mao Chong, whose much-lauded pizzas are so popular they've been known to run out: this has happened to me, but at least I could drown my sorrows in a Thirsty Caterpillar. Let battle commence!

In the Red Corner: Smoked Pork & Mushroom, Gung Ho! (RMB 63, medium)

Style: Pancake-flat. Netherlands-flat. Matzo-flat. I'm exaggerating a lot, but I find that a lot of Gung Ho! pizzas are very ... flat. Everything adheres very, very tightly to the crust, and the baked-on cheese acts as a kind of glossifying superglue. I'd be impressed if I wasn't slightly afraid.

Crust: Thin and crunchy. This is the new formula crust: To be honest, I preferred the old. Is it my imagination, or was the old just slightly saltier?

Cheese & sauce: Excellent sauce-spread and commendable coverage. Still a little bit scared of that cheese. Perhaps more of said cheese would ease my fear, hint hint nudge nudge.

Toppings: Pig pieces tough and slightly chewy, and I'm not sure where the smoke comes in. Good 'shrooms - the menu cites "wild mushrooms," which gives said fungus a little locavore-cred and me a vague reassurance that their pizza is reasonably priced. Also, does that phrase conjure up the image of Rich Akers and Jade Grey gambolling in a forest, mushroom-baskets in hand for anyone else? No? OK. Yeah.

Satisfaction: Honestly, I'd like the flavors to be kicked up a little. This is something I've noticed in their other pizzas, too. But overall, it's a tasty pizza. Three-quarters of a medium pie would feed me adequately, or 90 percent of a guy (we're scientific here at the Beijinger!) Thinness is an issue - it's kind of like the South Beach dieter of pizzas: still fun to be around, but unnaturally thin and a little too peppy (exclamation mark!).

Morning after: Corrugated cardboard. But, as far as corrugated cardboard goes, passable. I plunked it in the magic heating machine (aka microwave) and it came out pretty delish.

Next up ...

In the Blue Corner: The Geek, Mao Mao Chong (RMB 55)

Style: Cute-as-a-button and baby-faced. It looks like the toppings are in a portrait frame.

Crust: Not my favorite. I like my crust a little softer, and fresh-off-the-rise. This one is doing a biscuity thing on the back, but at least it's a well-flavored biscuit.

Cheese & sauce: Appealingly browned mozzarella, no sauce.

Toppings: Gorgonzola and leeks. Judicious, controlled application of gorgonzola (good!) and leeks are totally underrated as a topping. Slightly caramelized by the oven, lightly sweetish and fragrant. Shakespeare once said in Henry V that leek-wearing was an "ancient tradition." It's due for a reissue, no?

Satisfaction: It's times like this when I wish fervently that it was professionally acceptable just to insert a cat macro with the words "om nom nom nom" on it, but work blog isn't Facebook (yet). In other words, it was incredibly tasty, and more would have made it even better.

Morning after: It's a bar, so I was too embarrassed to ask for a take-out container (not that I think they have them) and OK, I ate the whole thing. My bad.

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From a value-for-money perspective, Gung Ho! is better: Mao Mao Chong's portion size could do with a boost (I would be willing to pay, I should add). And Gung Ho! does do a better job crust-wise. If they're sticking to their new formula, though, they might think of going the Papa John's route and offer dipping sauces with their pizzas. I slathered my crust in some of their Caesar dressing and it was goooooood. Still, as far as (un-Caesar'd) taste goes, I'm making an executive decision.

Verdict: Mao Mao Chong

Well, that's it, folks! This cheese-eater's going to hit the gym. You, Reader, should make sure you haven't missed any previous battles, because more pizza fun might be coming your way ...

Episode XI: Twilight v Bang! Bang! Pizza
Episode X : La Pizza v The Tree
Episode IX: Kro's Nest v Tube Station Pizza
Episode VIII: Alio Olio v Annie's
Episode VII: Alla Osteria v Cornerstone
Episode VI: Scott's Family Restaurant v Nasca
Episode V: Vineyard Cafe v Alba
Episode IV: Tavola v Pizza by LMPlus
Episode III: The Den v Pizza Buona
Episode II: Eatalia v Pyro Pizza
Episode I: Hutong Pizza v Pass-by Bar

Photos: Susan Sheng